It was a dreary, dismal day in London on the 31st, but I had a suitably enjoyable day. It started off with me waking up at 7am after getting six hours of sleep, slightly hungover from the day before (despite only having, like, four drinks over the course of five hours. I blame drinking wine, champagne and rum all in one night). Then I transported 100 cupcakes on a bus that inched along at a snail’s pace through Wandsworth (where I live) and that, unbeknownst to me and the other passengers, was on a replacement route due to road construction and ended up dropping me off a mile and a half away from my intended destination, a destination that was only one mile away from my place of origin.
So I walked, carrying 100 cupcakes, for about 30 minutes to the Tube station in the drizzling rain. By the time I got to the Tube station, wet and angry, the next train was due to arrive in two minutes. Excellent luck! But then the train came trundling into the station, its driver hanging out the front window, saying that the train wasn’t in service. He may have given me the one-finger salute; although I admit that I may be remembering this inaccurately. The next train was in 15 minutes. Wonderful. Oh, how I love the District line in Putney.
I eventually got a train and made it to Earl’s Court station with my cupcakes, although I soon found that, despite my destination being Earl’s Court Exhibition Hall, I was really going to Earl’s Court Exhibition Hall II, which is just outside West Brompton Tube Station. Instead of getting back on the Tube, I walked with my 100 cupcakes nearly an entire stop to the other station.
Once inside the Exhibition Hall, cupcakes dispatched to the appropriate bodies, I had a wander around (there was a ‘Glam Show’ going on) and ended up buying a handbag. I like handbags.
I decided to forgo underground transportation completely and soon realised that a bus travelled directly between Earl’s Court and Wandsworth (where I live) and only had a journey time of 12 minutes. Time it took me to get to Earl’s Court from Wandsworth: 1 hour and 45 minutes. Time it took me to get from Earl’s Court to Wandsworth: 12 minutes. Did TFL (Transport for London) tell me on its online Journey Planner that there was a bus from Wandsworth to Earl’s Court in the first place? No. For that matter, did it warn me about road construction and buses and replacement routes? No.
In any event, I made it home in one piece, peered into the kitchen which was covered in a heavy dusting of icing sugar at this point, and decided I would take a bath. I took a long bath and decided to start over. After this, I had a leisurely afternoon and got ready to go to a Zombie Halloween party. Below is a picture from the party. Can you find me?