From the “things I say to make my osteopath uncomfortable” file

While rubbing out my right glute (ie, rubbing my butt)

Osteo: I don’t understand why you’re still getting pain, really. Because this all through here is really soft.

Me: . . .

Osteo: Not that I’m saying it’s fat.

Me: Yeah. THANKS, A LOT.

Osteo: . . .

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