Despite living in London for nearly 4 years now, I still find quintessentially British stuff quite funny.
–What biscuits should I pick up from the shops, Diane? –Oh, get those nice ones, Charles. I like those nice ones.
Someone once told me to avoid describing things as ‘nice’, because it’s an essentially empty adjective. And this is probably why.
They’re not great biscuits. Not luxury ones either. Just nice.
I bought the Rich Tea biscuits instead. Mostly because they contain nearly half the calories of the Nice ones, which probably means if they were renamed they’d be ‘OK biscuits’ or maybe ‘All Right biscuits’, but such is the power of branding. Rich Tea sounds much – ahem – nicer.
I suppose I’m not really one to be poking fun at other people’s dietary habits, though. A couple of hours later I popped out to the shop and purchased a packet of Pom Bears and a small tin of peas. Every single person I passed on the pavement gave me quite a stare.
Who would have thought carrying a tin of petit pois while shovelling one’s face full of reconstituted potato snack would be so attention-soliciting. Not me.