Alan: Could you email [new girl] your style guide, perchance? Her surname is [new girl surname].

Me: got it.

Me: is she related to [other colleague]?

Alan: As far as I’m aware, no. Weird coincidence, though.

Me: indeed

Me: I’ve never heard of the name [other colleague and new girl surname], which is why I ask.

Me: I’m not a bigot.

Alan: Larissa “THEY’RE ALL THE SAME” Gillotti.

Alan: Your secret is safe with me.